"Nevine" or "Nevine"?

Tonight at 4 am, as I said my last prayers of the night, I lay my whole upper body on my knees and laid my head at their tips, I finalized my daily personal requests, then I suddenly felt myself taking this posture: it was immensely soothing, very yoga-days-reminiscent and I started taking several deep breaths and paused, I took more breaths and paused, the more I did so, the more I felt the blood rushing into my head, but in a good way, as it was withdrawing the terrible anxiety i have been feeling for the past five hours from my gut and spreading to my entire body, slowly creeping up to my head, all in all orchestrated by my deep breaths. Then out of the blue, came a voice:
"Nevine"

"Nevine"

"Nevine"

It could have been me trying to remember my name, or thats what it seemed at the first instant, but by the second "Nevine", something changed: as it hit me that it wasn't me saying "Nevine", it wasn't another voice. But for a split second, it sounded like how "Nevine" appeared to others. This may be from the phonetic aspect of my name, it having 2 vowels obliges the speaker to do some tongue twisting and somehow realize once you say it that it has nothing to do with Arab or Egyptian names (thank you mum, kudos dad) but no, that still wasn't it.
I sat in this awkward position asking myself why all of a sudden have I decided to say my own name? and then, for a split second or maybe less, it dawned on me.

This is the Nevine spoken as in how Nevine is seen.

You see.. most of us take our names for granted, I know many Nevines but when I speak out their names, I don't really consider mine in the process.

I said Nevine but I didn't really say it, Nevine was being said as others would say it, as other would see it, as others would feel it and as others would like to utter it.

This may be a very minor and meaningless observation, but the significance behind it for me is astounding. You see, for a good while, I wont dramatize and say my whole life, I have been very concerned (sometimes even reproached) about how others see me, I was manifesting my personality and justifying my individuality, whatever that is, as how it would appear to others. That being said, I worked from inside out, i.e. I focused on how me from within would like to be perceived and assumed that this is how others would see me. Example: If I was interested in how people view my mode of conversing I would usually see it from my own perspective, I would assume I use too many English with this person and I swear too much around these people…etc. Thats how I saw my manner of conversing and since I, as Nevine saw it as such, then I am sure everyone saw it as such. In other words, I made people's assumptions about me based upon MY OWN assumptions about myself.

Which brings us to the point of this rather confusing blog post: by hearing that 4 am "Nevine" this whole analysis above flipped upside down, for the first time I realized that the "Nevine" that I see is something completely different to the "Nevine" that people see. Again if we take the linguistics analysis above, just because I assume and I believe that I use too many English words in my conversations with X person, this does not necessarily mean that this X person sees it as such, he may see it that I use too many Arabic words in my speech for example.

Therefore, this is a phenomenal self discovery in my very own version of the science of 'self worth', if I insist I am a retard with a golden retriever hair and a piggy nose, even though I seem to others as a semi-retard with a Husky hair and a rather small nose. But me believing the former will eventually make everyone switch from the latter perspective of me and join me in my former view of myself. All of this because I heard my name today after my prayers.

I have always been amazed by the energies, the law of attraction (not The Secret, that was a literary rape case) and all that mumbo jumbo of karma, power of now, shakras and even projections. During my advertising days, they always used to tell me "you gotta believe that what what you are about to present to your client is the best work a creative has ever came up with, otherwise they will not buy it", and it used to somehow offend me, after endless days and 50 liters of Nescafe, this is not what is going to cut it! But it is.. sadly so, it is. You are what you believe you are, and people will not believe you if you do not believe in your ad boards about female depilatory products (or chocolate, or fizzy drinks, or el leban el se7ry..) If you envy men, act like them. If you envy Penguins, wear a tight skirt and walk like them. If you want to have madonna's career, go to Med school (she is an exception here).

Scared of that presentation? Start practicing Obama's 'Yes we can", or dig up your 15 year Oscar speech (20 in my case) Or simply take my revelation as your skate board and start saying your name out loud to yourself, you will laugh, you will feel stupid, but hey .. so what? you have had many stupid moments before, so You must be an expert on the stupidometer. Feel it. Believe it. Be it. Period.

Sorry, there is no laughter aspect in here, I forgot to mention I am a Gemini, which means one of my 26 personalities is writing my blog this time.

Happy Feast y'all, indulge on the Fatta (and name calling…ermmm… your name that is)

Sympathy For Lady Vengeance

"Sympathy For Lady Vengeance" is a 2005 Korean film for director Park Chan-wook. The film is the third installment in Park's The Vengeance Trilogy, following Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance (2002) and Oldboy (2003).

Of this trilogy I had only seen Oldboy, I was so moved by it that I refused to watch any of the remaining two films because it was inconceivable that any film would be as good as Oldboy, it was as if my mind could not or refused to handle any more great movies. It was exactly like eating the best piece of steak in the world, it is so well seasoned, very tender, cooked just as you like it and it filled you up to perfection. So going and having a piece of perfect chicken or salmon steak was a nice idea, but the steak made you feel so good that you didnt want to adjust your taste buds to anything else no matter how good it is.

And I have this sad habit with movies, when i watch a really good film, I tend to isolate myself afterwards, cause it gets very hard to get back to the real world and suck in other people/places' energies, I like to hang on to the energy of that movie for as long as I can.

Now back to our perfect piece of steak.. So I had been resisting watching any of the two remaining movies of the trilogy.. till yesterday. A friend of mine started telling me about  it, I resisted, he told me the story, I still resisted. He then popped up his iPhone and showed me the poster (look above), and of course I surrendered on the spot..

So I finally got the film, cancelled all my plans for the day (i can foresee a later need for isolation) and sat down and watched it.

And oh boy.. This was no steak, no chicken and definitely no Salmon.. This was a piece of fine candy, no actually a fine piece of a big, freshly baked and crunchy almond macaron thats all gooey from the inside!

The movie tells the story of Lee Geum-ja, it starts with her release from prison. She had been imprisoned for the murder of a little boy: "Won-mo" 13 years ago. Lee Geum-ja is innocent of the murder, she confessed the false crime by order of Mr. Baek, the real killer who kidnapped and threatened to murder her newborn daughter if she refused. Lee who was nicknamed "Kind-Hearted Geum-Ja." by her cell mates, comes out of prison as a different woman, she wears red eye shadow throughout the whole film to make her look less innocent and more evil, and every time she meets someone from her past they ask her "why have you changed so much?". She has one thing in mind: Kill Bill! sorry Mr Baek! ..

 she goes around scheming and gathering favors from ex cell mates to set out and finish him off. However, things don't go as planned, she tracks down her daughter and finds out she got adopted by an Australian couple, she goes to visit her, the daughter becomes obsessed with her and threatens to kill herself if she doesnt take her back to Seoul with her. Lee takes her back, and drags her around Seoul with her as she hunts down Mr Baek. She finally finds him, and right before she kills him, she finds out that he had many other victims other than Won-mo.

 Lee finds tapes he recorded of each child that he had killed. She also finds out that all of these children's parents didnt know that they died, they simply thought they were kidnapped for ransom. This is where the real magic of the movie begins for me: because Lee (our lady vengeance) then decides to make her vengeance a mass vengeance and brings in each family to take part of his killing with her.

She shows each one of them the tape of their child's murder, and then gives them the choice of either handing Mr Baek over to the authorities or... torturing him, one by one till he dies.

I will leave the plot here in case you are planning to see it..

The thing is with this film, the story is not that original, the actress is not that charismatic ( I wouldnt remember her if I saw her again). But the whole movie is one piece of art, usually the highest reviewed movies are not that entertaining to watch, dont ask me why, you are bored the whole movie, then when its done, you just cant stop thinking about it, thats why they are so successful because it means that their message got through to you, and if you have any knowledge of movie making, you will know that this is the number one dream of any film maker, to deliver a message to you. A little pop quizz to help us here: can you remember any message behind: a- I Know What You Did Last Summer, b- Gigli or c- Step up 3D (or any 3D film for that matter..) ... there you go..!

But with Sympathy for Lady Vengeance, I got the message and I was entertained from the first shot till the very last word in the closing credits. 

The directing is genius to have succeeded on all these levels, his casting skills may not be that successful, but who cares, he delivered his message, he entertained his audience visually and vocally. And, what is it about Asian film making? when it comes to artistic direction, you feel like they come from another planet, several shots made me pause the film and rewind it. The soundtrack was baroque-themed, featuring many pieces with harpsichord and baroque guitars, it has nothing to do with the film, the theme or its era, but it worked so well. Somehow throughout the film, you find yourself crying in a scene where she is putting her coat on, all because of the music!

Also, Lee's daughter (Jenny) serves as her conscience throughout the whole film: in the beginning when Lee was released from prison, they presented her with a block of tofu to eat as a symbol of her beginning a clean white life, she reacts by throwing it on the floor. By the end of the film, picture this shot: Lee is standing in front of Jenny, who is dressed in white. Lee has the same piece of Tofu in her hands, its heavily snowing around them, there is a boy dancing under the snow in the background, Broque music is playing in the playground. Jenny then makes her weep and bury her face in a block of tofu and the closing credits comes on screen, still with the Baroque music playing.

End result is, this movie has nothing to do with Oldboy, it is loyal to the theme of the vengeance trilogy, by depicting a vengeance story. Oldboy distrubed you to the core of your very last cell, Lady Vengeance made you reflect on the real significance of revenge, or more accurately, made you ask yourself: is it really worth it? Because like most revenge movies, she didnt get back her daughter and happily walk off into her new life like what Uma did in Kill Bill. She took off her red eye shadow, stood in front of her daughter, wept then buried her face in tofu.

Watch it, and no matter what baggage you still have on your back, this movie will help you dump it off.. actually it will make you believe that there is no baggage there.. that its useless to have walked around all these years with your back arched from all that weight.. No? tab go eat some tofu...its a start :)

(thank you for reading.. no really.. you all make me happy.. much love from my side)

I globalize, therefore I am..

One of my favorite definitions of globalization is "the shrinkage of time and space"

I am sure that you are now presuming that this is a post related to heavy topics: politics/economy …etc
But no it is not pertaining to any of these topics, however it IS about a heavy topic, the most heavily discussed topic on the planet: Relationships.

So what is the relationship between relationships and globalization?
Its a simple one: The grand demise that relationships are suffering from is all because of globalization.
Ok.. lets simplify this further...

You meet a guy in a party, you spend the whole night talking, you obviously like each other, you go home (thinking about him), you go to sleep (still thinking about him), you wake up (trying not to think about him).. Till suddenly, the door bell rings, you answer it: and find him standing in front of you. How would you react? you would definitely freak out and classify him as a stalker. Right?

Ok, now what if this happened during the 19th century?  would you still consider him a stalker? yes.. remember all those Jane Austen/Bronte films where the 'suitor' would show up unannounced after one encounter, to inform the maiden of his profound interest in her?

Now flash Forward to 2010, you meet a guy, you like each other, he is keen on showing you that he is interested, but he doesn't want to be pushy, so the next day you find a friend request on Facebook. You check out his profile first to see what he is like, and you bring out your check list. Profile pictures are cool? check. You then go through his status updates, he doesn't quote Paulo Coelho: check. He doesn't even have any status updates: double check. You then check out his photo albums, they are blocked: hummm.. ok..check. You wait for another hour: then you accept the friend request. Hey.. he is online! you wait.. he is not chatting with you. Your boss starts screaming at you, you close your Facebook and get back to work.

Day 2: you go online, he is online too, his chat window pops up:
'hey!!'
"helloooo (multiply the o's cause that means you are nice but still you only typed one word, so not too keen)"
"sup?"
"all good.. u?"
(bla bla.. his pronunciation sucks, however he still capitalizes names and doesnt use emoticons.. till your boss starts screaming again, you close your FB, get back to work)
..and this scenario repeats itself for another 3 days, till one day he makes a move! he asks for your BB pin! and before you know it, your BBM alert tone starts buzzing..
'hey!!'
"helloooo (multiply the o's cause that means you are nice but still you only typed one word, so not too keen)"
"sup?"
(bla bla.. this time he is using odd emoticons, but its cool cause the BBM emoticons are actually cute.. this goes on till your boss starts screaming again, you put your phone on silent and get back to work)
.. and yup.. this scenario repeats itself for another 3 days, till he makes yet another grand move, he follows you on Twitter! he starts mentioning you and occasionally retweets too!
Did I annoy you? I am sure I did, cause I have annoyed myself already!

So what does Globalization have to do with this? its simple, it made everything accessible, in the old days you had to physically meet each other to really get to know each other, or the more conservative (debatable) manner of asking around to find out about a girl/guy's interests and character. Nowadays you just check who he follows on Twitter, or what she posts on her wall. Globalization has made it so easy, it brought us all closer via internet, 3G, IPads, and all that junk. They all testify to one fact about human beings in the 21st century: that we have this incredible URGE to be accessible to each other 24/7! wherever we are: even if you are having a shower, you can still answer your phone! yes people! Motorolla are launching a 100% waterproof phone (porn jokes aside please). 

First there was the land line telephone: that made people accessible whenever they are home, then there were answering machines: that made them semi-accessible when they are not home. Then there was mobile phones: that made them accessible when they are awake and active. Then the mobile phones kept evolving: texting happened, she is not answering, no big deal i will just SMS her. Then phones evolved even more, BBM/ Ping/WhatsApp happened, you don't have enough credit, but you can harass her whenever you want with all the cute emoticons, pictures and forwards you can master, and these applications allow you to find out if she has read your messages or not. And that is just ONE form of communication, how about the internet? E-mails.. remember those? I was actually fond of E-mails, they were my only link to the Bronte and Austen era: cause they allowed a person to actually sit down and write his feelings out and then with the click of a button, send it to you. But then Facebook happened, and people became incapable of breathing without it (myself shamelessly included), and the social networks started multiplying, each with their own promise of offering you an original portal and manner of virtual flirting, and ensuring you that it will never be seen as stalking (remember Hi5)?

So, yup ..'the shrinkage of time and space' managed to shrink many things with it: courting (yes, that's what they used to call it) is long gone now. It has also shrunk Romance: now if you wanna look into his eyes, you have to look at those of Bruce Lee in his current profile pic. the closest you will get to winking at her is by 'poking' her, that is if Facebook manages to notify her in time. And when you do spend time together, there is always a third party involved: the buzzer of the phone. If you wanna tell him you miss him, post a youtube song on his wall. If you wanna tell him you are mad at him: update your BBM status, follow your ex, or better yet eat your phone's heart out, burn your hard disk and feed your wall..

I will end this post with the words of the great dame of acting Drew Barrymore with probably the deepest line she ever said in a movie (here its from 'He is just not that You'):

"i had this guy leave me a voice mail at work so i called him at home and then he emailed me into my blackberry so i texted to his cell, and he emailed me into my home account and the whole thing just got out of control and i miss the days where you had 1 phone number and one answering machine and that 1 answering machine housed 1 cassette tape, and that 1 cassette tape either had a message from a guy or it didn't. Now you have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by 7 different technologies, its exhausting"

Happy pokes and tweets everyone :)

In Glozell we trust

Yo! yo! give it up to Glozell!
Or in normal people language: 'please meet Glozell'

A friend of mine posted one of her videos last week, i checked it out and man do i dig her! (ok! i will stop the bro language)... she is quiet something!

For some reason, her friends convinced her that she s funny as hell and should start her own video diaries and share her wisdom with the world about everything.

She's got over 900 videos on youtube, i tried to watch them all, but watching a Glozell video on youtube is like having molokheya for a snack.
Anyway, these are the ones i thought worthy of sharing:


This is her take on Keisha (she calls her 'Ketchup')... and since i think Keisha is the love child of Jack Daniel's and puke.. I now truly give it up to Glozell!







She also gets many compliments from the 'brothers' on her very (yes... VERYYY) generous booty.. so she took it further and did this parody..







and an 'iss you lonely??' parody



So ladies, next time you wear them jeans.. smack that booty and be grateful there is a Glozell out there.

(btw, if anyone's interested, she is doing a meet & greet in Target tomorrow)

The Nouveau Cool

(warning: i know many will be offended by this, but I never denied that I was an elitist, its one of my few cherished defects..)


Ever heard of the 'Nouveau Cool"?

No you didnt, cause i ve just invented it!
let me familiarize you a bit with my new poignant term..
(another warning: if you are not one of those lame Egyptians living in the margins of the Socialite mishaps, this article will be total mumbo jumbo to you..)

When you walk into a party, take a good look around you, all of these kids are the Nouveau Cool.. The Nouveau Cool are the kids (yes anyone below 25 is a kid to me!!) that are everywhere now. They have invented their own fashion, perfected their new found music taste, have their very own lingo and body language, and move around in herds.
but the sad thing is.. there is nothing 'inventive' about any of the above, the fashion is a scary Paris Hilton-Gaga-Cyrus mix. The music taste doesn't go beyond Guetta and the Black Eyed Peas. And as for the body language: oh well, how many movements do you need to communicate 'tense/slut/small wee wee'
Now comes the meaty part: they move around in herds.. Our dear Nouveau Cool are a bunch of very good friends who suddenly became very good friends because they share the same desire: They WANT to be cool..they want to be everywhere, to go to every single party, to take pictures of themselves in these parties, and post these eye stinging pictures on FaceBook to prove s0mething. That they are cool, they are in, they are happening..etc..
They are also people that suddenly popped up, you ve never heard of them before and suddenly they are EVERYWHERE. Or if you have heard of them before, most of them are that shy guy or that weird smelling girl you used to know but couldn't remember their name.

It is a well known fact that the Egyptian society is dying, if you compare our lifestyle 15 years ago to today, you will understand what I mean: the Mahmoodaky parties are over, all the 3azayem now take place only during sahel season, the 3azza now is held in a mosque for 3 hours instead of the 3 day 3azza, and many people now would rather create a Blackberry group to catch up rather than meet up over coffee. No one even goes to coffee shops anymore, people meet up for a drink, a movie, or a Playstation.
So, we cant really blame the Nouveau Cool for leaping into the social scene and spreading like fungus, the lack of a society made the Nouveau Cool believe that they are the cream of the society: they are the crowd of Tamarai and the reason why Cairo Jazz is suddenly happening again.
I open my Facebook everyday and i see new albums: usually of the same girl, in the same posture in 150 pictures. Or of the same guy of the same pause with 150 girls on each arm. when i get through the pictures, I see the status updates: "xxx is partying it up in Sokhna (since when is sokhna a party scene?)" or "xxx is so getting ready to jet to France (who gives a shit)"..

The Nouveau Cool for me are the biggest indicator that this society is over, the attitudes are getting uglier, the outings are becoming scarier, and me... well.. older :)
Yes, i am very aware that i DO sound like a has been who is entering her 30's, but I kid you not, back in the days, we ALL knew each other cause either we were related or family friends, life was much simpler, you go out once every week, and then you go home, watch Falcon Crest (ok.. The Bold and the Beautiful in my case) and go to sleep.

oh well... i am off to bed.. where is my night anti wrinkle cream?

Let the Right One In

'Let the Right One In' is a Swedish vampire film that has nothing to do with horror, vampires or any other genre.
it transcends all movies in its content and how the director chose to deal with such a story
I heard of it a while back, when i saw the trailer of its American remake which is to be released next month.
And as they tell you 'do not judge a book by its movie', in our case here it should be 'do not judge a movie by its American remake', so I went and watched it because I knew i would kick myself if I ended up seeing the final American version.

The movie tells the story of a very odd 12 year old girl: Eli, she moves in next to Oskar who is of the same age, and they fall in love throughout the course of the movie. As you might expect, the plot takes the expected turns (Oskar is constantly bullied, Eli saves him. Strange murders happen in town and Oskar discovers its all Eli's doing. ).. that said, watching these events is a totally different experience, there are no scary scenes in the film, no sound effects whatsoever and there are no hot cheerleader running around with double D cleavage..

I had given up on vampire movies since I saw Bram Stocker's Dracula back in the 90's.. but when i heard of this film, the title itself (based on a Morissey song) made me extremely curious.
And indeed it did not disappoint me, the movie is very slow, there is absolutely nothing charismatic about the kids. But thats exactly what made me fall in love with it, Eli is bordering unattractive and Oskar looks like a classic Swede (so blonde that you can't tell his hair from his skin).

Tomas Alfredson the director, did an excellent job by being totally indifferent to the viewer's fast paced conditioned entertainment needs, he took his time with the story, and like most European film makers: this film gave us a character study instead of a complicated plot. The scenes took their time and weight, the dialogue was scarce and there were no complicated sets.

But what really got to me is the fact that this movie is not about vampires, it is about the kind of love a 12 year old experiences, the unconditional kind, the kind that is not cautious and eager to apply what it learned from previous experiences.

It is not visual by any means, you will not remember any scenes because they will all be clouded by two or three extremely powerful scenes, one of which shows Eli with blood all over her face as if it is chocolate sauce.

It is really a shame that we live in an age where kids define their future based upon twilight release dates, and have not heard of great vampire films such as Nosferatu .

One of the biggest misconceptions about vampire films is that they should either be terrifying and bloody, or Romantic and corny .
But every once in a while a movie like this comes along and gives us a completely different perspective on one of the greatest myths ever created.
Please stop obsessing with Twilight, I mean really Edward has the most vertically challenged hair i have ever seen, and Bella has two expressions, and she somehow ends up cross eyed in the rest. Vampires do NOT sparkle in sunlight and werewolves do not have piggy noses (what the hell are werewolves even doing in a VAMPIRE movie!)..